Ah yes, the ascot look. I blame Fred from Scooby-Doo for popularizing that one. I remember my mom sent my brother and me off to the first day of school with Brylcreemed pompadours and butterfly-collar shirts tucked into our knee-length polyester shorts. Completing the look for each of us was an ornate imitation silk ascot. Immediately upon boarding the school bus, it became apparent that certain fashion-forward trends were not as warmly embraced in the "heartland" as they were on the coasts. I have blocked out most of the memory, but I recall a sudden hush as we appeared in our foppish finery followed by howls of derisive laughter. You know you have overstepped a boundary when a kid wearing mustard and green plaid pants with perpetual nasal leakage and a big wad of tape holding his Coke-bottle glasses together is pointing and making fun of you. Nothing like making a good first impression.

What did a bunch of 5th graders do with that name?

With hairstyles changing, you can see quite a few of the boys were influenced by one of the 20th Century's greatest entertainers: Moe Howard of The 3 Stooges!

No question in my mind, the bespectacled boy and girl in the back row are the two smartest kids in the class. The two taller girls to their right are at the other end of the spectrum having been held back for several years.

[Ahem. TheoREM. - Dave]

I actually checked the definition but didn't notice the misspelling. I'm going to leave it there, it looks better than theorem.

The blonde girl on the left must have spent a whole lot of time in the morning making those Shirley Temple curls. And the boy on the right looks like he forgot his medications that morning ...

As a former bully punchball I don't even want to know about the social dynamics in that class.

All I can divine at first glance is that most probably the two sole kids with glasses must have been the favourite punchballs in that class. It's not just the glasses, the attire also fits the profile.

And concerning conservtive dress, Ms. Twiggy is there, too.

in the first row middle, what's with the outfit? Mom thought it was too short as a dress so wear shorts under it?

Some very snappy dressers. There are two boys in the front row that look like they could be twins. And there's a couple of girls in the top row that are growin' up faster than the boys!

Everyone here is in basic Kentucky conservative getup, with the exception of the kid on the 2nd row, third from the right. Obviously influenced by the British invasion, his wide labels and ascot tie make him look like a young Roger Daltry.

Can anyone spot the two early bloomers?

Yes, fourth from the right. The ears next to me belong to Mike Brady. And top row second from left, I believe that's Will Kerschner. Second from right top row was a girl I had a crush on, Lori Sadler. And our teacher's name was Mrs. Bottomly.

Top row, second from the left!