... without stopping by the lava-flowing, boulder-spewing, active volcanoes that encircle the Nation's Capitol??

One evening as the sun went down and the jungle fire was burning
Down the track came a hobo hiking and he said boys I'm not turning
I'm headin for a land that's far away beside the crystal fountains
So come with me we'll go and see the Big Rock Candy Mountains
...
In the Big Rock Candy Mountains you never change your socks
And the little streams of alcohol come a-trickling down the rocks
The brakemen have to tip their hats and the railroad bulls are blind
There's a lake of stew and of whiskey too
You can paddle all around 'em in a big canoe
In the Big Rock Candy Mountains

You can just see the end of what looks like a truncheon of some sort peeking out from behind the crate he's sitting on. He doesn't look too intimidating at first glance, but I would imagine that first impression would change quickly for any tramp that he found riding the rails for free.

Reminds me of todays TSA personnel.