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VINTAGRAPH • WPA • WWII • YOU MEAN A WOMAN CAN OPEN IT?

Mrs. New Tunes In: 1924

January 14, 1924. "Mrs. Harry S. New," wife of the Postmaster General. This might be good fodder for a caption contest. Which commences right now with yours truly as the judge. National Photo Company glass negative. View full size.

January 14, 1924. "Mrs. Harry S. New," wife of the Postmaster General. This might be good fodder for a caption contest. Which commences right now with yours truly as the judge. National Photo Company glass negative. View full size.

 

On Shorpy:
Today’s Top 5

War of the Worlds

Come in, Commander Zord, come in!! We have infiltrated and the mere humans are none the wiser. But couldn't you have found a more comfortable race for us to dress as? This girdle is killing me.

Radiola IV

The receiver is an RCA Radiola IV, made in the General Electric factory in Schenectady about 1923.

11

These go to eleven.

Mrs.New finds her purpose in life

Dialing up a Prosperous (and timely) Happy New Year.

"Sigh...."

"I am sorry, my dear, but I definitely feel some resistance in between the second and third windings of the primary transformer coils. Honestly, if you would stop fooling around, posing for those silly photographers down at the factory during your work time, this sort of mistake would not occur!"

Earth to Mars

Can you hear me now?

ZZZZAAP!!

Another victim of a poor HMO, Mrs. Harry S. New demonstrates her "Fry King" home electroshock machine.

WOO-HOO! I just realized I'm the 71st comment, breaking the Leave it to Beaver's letter record of 70 replies!
If my witty caption doesn't win a prize, perhaps this achievement will secure me a place in Shorpy history.

TV

"I just heard John Logie Baird has invented a television. Now if I fiddle with this knob a bit I might be able to see what all the fuss is about"

Art

"Art Bell learns the secret of time travel."

Can You Hear Me Now?

If I get these just so, I get five bars... isn't technology amazing??!!

Happy Hour News Team

"It was hotter than Hooker in Heater today, and hotter than Heater in Hellmouth…"

(As long as we're doing Firesign Theatre.)

That Was The Year That Was, 1924

Oh, what wonders are afoot! Grandmothers are bobbing their hair, naked angels have been seen cavorting about, some boys are certainly up to no good, families are living in automobiles, fist-pounding rabble-rousers are making trouble, puppies are on the loose, an elephant has a toothache, the Babe enlisted, and Meg Ryan is out driving around in one of those hybrids. Time for a nap!

Transmission

Mrs. New? Are you receiving me? This is your master's voice. You will tell your husband to accept my illustration of a mallard for the newest US Postage stamp. Then my dream of world domination will be realized! Muwahahah!

Page 2

"Oooh where is that program? Honey, you have to come listen to this program I herd yesterday. It was interesting, but I don't think it will last very long. Now what was that guys name? Oh yeah, it was Paul Harvey."

"Can I Pick Up Duluth?"

"Duluth??? Bucko, you can get Tierra del Fuego!!!"

Would you hush up for a while Harry?

"I'm trying to hear the advertisement from People's Drug Store...Myrtle told me that they are repeating their unprecedented one-day sale on Star vibrators like they had in 1921 and I need to get rid of these wrinkles and get relief from my stiff neck."

New Job for New

"Mrs. New relished her new job with the NSA and found the Army's pillow talk especially titillating."

She Has the Answer

Who knows that evil lurks in the hearts and minds of men? MRS. NEW KNOWS!

It's Going, Going...

"Oh drat! Every time the Cubs have a chance to win a series this darn radio stops working."

A new record?

I believe this is a new record for the number of posts to a picture. Have we bettered the "Leave it to Beaver letter" picture?

[The Beaver Letter has 70 comments; this one has 57 so far. No, wait. 58! - Dave]

Ooh!

"How strange. Listening to President Coolidge is giving me a tingle down my leg! Or is it just a short in these infernal ear things that Harry insists are the cat's pajamas?"

A word from our sponsor...

Einbinder, the finest in flypaper.

The truth...

"Radio waves, my foot...I KNOW there's a tiny orchestra in there!"

And now let's go to our man in the street...

"–lly Ballou here, reporting live from Union Station where General Pershing, Senator John McCain, President Roosevelt and Scranton Pennsylvania paperboy Joey Biden have just arrived!"

Suspense

"Who knows what evil lurks -- "

Mrs. Harry

"Even though my new name is New through marriage, I prefer the use of my given name first, then New."

Hello Senator

"And now a word from the junior Senator from Arizona, the Honorable Mr. John McCain!"

W.O.L.D.

DJ: Go ahead caller; you’re on the W.O.L.D. All Oldies Request Line.

Caller: Yes, my name is Harry New and I would like to request a tune and dedicate it to my wife.

DJ: No problem, what can I play for you Harry?

Caller: It was played at our wedding.

DJ: Ah, that’s sweet Harry. What was it?

Caller: I believe it was cave man hitting rock with stick.

Oh there it is... 'Sister Kate'....

"... I think I've figured out what 'shimmy' REALLY refers to!"

War of the Worlds

Martians have landed in Grover's Mill, New Jersey!

WoTW

"Earthlings, it is useless to resist. Put down your primitive weapons, no human power can stop us -- AAH-CHOO! -- feeling weak ... so tired ... "(Sound of spaceship crashing, then static.)

The Shorpy Photograph Hour

Mrs. New listens to her favorite program, "The Shorpy Photograph Hour." While she enjoys the detailed descriptions of the photos, she particularly enjoys the comments from the audience.

[Fascinating. Who's the sponsor? - Dave]

Darn.

I could have sworn KDKA was here a minute ago.

Almost There

Half turn to the right, quarter turn to the left and I'll have all the gold of Fort Knox!

Can't Get No Satisfaction

Mrs. New listening intently waiting for the chance to win the Rolling Stones concert tickets.

She says “I was only 5 years old when the Rolling Stones first appeared on the scene but I always liked their music. Even though he’s older than me I still think Keith looks hot.”

What do you take me for?

Iceland just declared bankruptcy yesterday. Nice try Dave.

[How about a quarter-interest in Ford or General Motors, then? Your choice. I'd have to count out my spare-change jar first, but I'm pretty sure I can cover it. - Dave]

Regarding the caption contest....

What does the winner win?

[Silly me, how could I have forgotten. The winner receives a 50 percent ownership stake in the Republic of Iceland! - Dave]

Ripped Off

Wait a minute--this Etch-a-Sketch doesn't work at all! That's 32 cents I'll never see again.

Quiet!

Y'all hush now, the president is coming on !!

My New Joe Biden TV!

"Why, it's President Roosevelt ... who hasn't been elected yet ... commenting on the Stock Market Crash ... which happened four years before he was elected! Gosh, I just love my new Joe Biden™ television!"

Caption

"Mrs. New first learns that she's been officially renamed 'Mrs. Old' "

Knobs

'Mr. New began to get ideas.'

"I hear dead people."

"I hear dead people."

That's 34 left, then 24

That's 34 left, then 24 right--no, that was not the tumbler--26 right.

Sssh.

No one knew Alice Gore invented the radio. It was a big secret.

Quickly now

"Mrs. New rapidly rotates the knobs to 4, 8, 15, 16, 23, 42! Whew! That was close!"

*Pfff*

I swear, this pie will never bake if I can't get the gas...to...headphones? Wow. I am so stoned.

Honey, can you help me?

I'm having trouble opening the safe.

"New" woman

"China Clipper calling Alameda, China Clipper calling Alameda"

Orgasmatron

Mrs. New placed the sound receivers in the correct location and gave her newfangled Orgasmatron a workout.

"It's turned up all the way, Harry dear, and I don't feel a thing."

"Yes, dear, I knew that already," Mr. New said with resigned sigh.

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